Hockey Gods

[pi2000]

A 2 week interruption due to a covid outbreak.

Top pairing Risto and McCabe having career years, one out indefinitely with long haul COVID symptoms, the other a season ending knee injury.

Borgen, a shining light in an otherwise dark season, suffers a broken arm.

Eichel possessed by the spirit of Ville Lieno.

Microscopic shooting % (historically low at even strength).

Goal post after goal post after goal post.

What can we do to appease the gods?   Burnt offering?  Blood sacrifice?   

Something needs to be done. 

[Marvin]

As my will, so mote it be.

(Eoh evohay!  Eoh evohay!  Eoh evohay! ... )

ogo terru sawb maleht tnew yram tah tereh wyreve wons saetih wsawece elfstib malelt tiladah yram.

Eko, eko Azal!  (Eko, eko Azal!)

As my will, so mote it be.

(Might as well go with something Buffalo Science Fiction fandom is known for finding...)

Edited February 24, 2021 by Marvin, Sabres Fan
fixed a tyop

[LabattBlue]

1 hour ago, pi2000 said:

What can we do to appease the gods?   Burnt offering?  Blood sacrifice?   

Something needs to be done. 

Make peace with Pat LaFontaine?

Hire an experienced PoHO?

Kim and Terry hold a presser tomorrow and announce "From this day forward, the two of us will have nothing to do with the hockey side of the business"?

The Academy of Hockey is to be dissolved ASAP, therefore no more candidates for promotion?

Send Rigas back to jail? 

Get rid of "Here we go now, Here we go now..."  and replace immediately with "Swords of a Thousand Men"?

[Stoner]

I think it somehow goes back to Lorentz murdering the bat. As fans let's start a GoFund Me campaign to save the bats. Or something.

[Scottysabres]

8 hours ago, PASabreFan said:

I think it somehow goes back to Lorentz murdering the bat. As fans let's start a GoFund Me campaign to save the bats. Or something.

On a side note, you just know that bat and the stick used by Lorentz in that game would have been great collectors items 😄

 

[bob_sauve28]

We need a witch doctor! 

 

[carpandean]

The bad mojo has to stem from losing on purpose for Eichel, right?  So ... and hear me out on this ... we should try to win on purpose!  Crazy, I know.  At this point, winning would just hurt our inevitable lottery odds, so actually trying to do it should appease the Gods.

 

[nucci]

1st step is stop believing in a god. Get a good, more experienced GM and better coach to start

Edited February 24, 2021 by nucci

[Stoner]

So we all meet at Canalside, in the approximate location where Lorentz slayed the bat, and release a bat to freedom. Of course we have to find a bat rehab center that would be willing to let us free one of their rehabbed bats. We can't kidnap a bat and then release it under the pretense of doing something admirable.

Not kidding, folks. These places exist. And it would be a great PR stunt for them.

[nfreeman]

1 hour ago, carpandean said:

The bad mojo has to stem from losing on purpose for Eichel, right?  So ... and hear me out on this ... we should try to win on purpose!  Crazy, I know.  At this point, winning would just hurt our inevitable lottery odds, so actually trying to do it should appease the Gods.

 

It started on Black Sunday.  The hockey gods were divided as to how long the punishment should last, and the moderates were able to keep it limited until Lindy got fired, at which point half of them joined the "make them bleed" contingent.  Then the tank took care of the last few holdovers, who couldn't believe how many fans went along with the idiotic plan, and made every last one of them disgusted with us and determined to keep us locked in the dungeon for a generation.

Then, after a time, one of them had mercy and allowed the One to sneak into the supermax prison from the Yukon, knowing that he might be able to free us before the sickness pervaded him too... 

[GASabresIUFAN]

I’d sacrifice RK to start.

Edited February 24, 2021 by GASabresIUFAN

[jsb]

I'm guessing that we have about 30 years to go, the last time they were this mad they made Moses wander in a desert for a long time.

[Stoner]

51 minutes ago, GASabresIUFAN said:

I’d sacrifice RK to start.

Am I to understand RK would be released in a hot air balloon at the same time the bat is freed?

[Marvin]

13 hours ago, PASabreFan said:

I think it somehow goes back to Lorentz murdering the bat. As fans let's start a GoFund Me campaign to save the bats. Or something.

Sorry, I just can't resist.

 

[GASabresIUFAN]

17 minutes ago, PASabreFan said:

Am I to understand RK would be released in a hot air balloon at the same time the bat is freed?

I think you place RK holding the bat in the hot air balloon and hope the hockey gods accept them both.

[DarthEbriate]

I believe in many forms of The Concept Of, the light side and the dark side of the Moulson/Ehrhoff, but I'm unfamiliar with these hockey gods. Who are they? What are their functions, names, and relationships?

[Marvin]

4 hours ago, bob_sauve28 said:

We need a witch doctor! 

 

Here's the original.  It might work better or be more offencive to the Hockey Gods, depending on whether they are woke, hidebound, our somewhere in between.

 

Edited February 24, 2021 by Marvin, Sabres Fan

[pi2000]

49 minutes ago, GASabresIUFAN said:

I think you place RK holding the bat in the hot air balloon and hope the hockey gods accept them both.

Throw a turdburger jersey on RK for his balloon ride to the heavens.     Drury and Briere will release the balloon from center ice at Canalside while RJ sings "Let Me Clear My Throat" in the background.

[Crusader1969]

17 hours ago, pi2000 said:

A 2 week interruption due to a covid outbreak.

Top pairing Risto and McCabe having career years, one out indefinitely with long haul COVID symptoms, the other a season ending knee injury.

Borgen, a shining light in an otherwise dark season, suffers a broken arm.

Eichel possessed by the spirit of Ville Lieno.

Microscopic shooting % (historically low at even strength).

Goal post after goal post after goal post.

What can we do to appease the gods?   Burnt offering?  Blood sacrifice?   

Something needs to be done. 

Waive Hutton?

[Stoner]

It should be noted that, as nfreeman points out, the Hockey Gods are political in nature. Senate-like almost. There are factions. One wing was lustily in support of breaking Jack's ankle last night. "Hobble him like that bitch in Misery!" exclaimed Pandolfo. (Hockey Gods assume the last name of retired former players.) Satan came through to broker a deal. Eichel's ankle would be only tweaked. And... he will go bald rapidly starting in 2023.

[mjd1001]

21 hours ago, pi2000 said:

 

Microscopic shooting % (historically low at even strength).

 

Would you believe right now...there are 5 teams in the league with a lower shooting percentage than the Sabres?  I would have through they would be last..or at best 2nd to last.

[pi2000]

1 minute ago, mjd1001 said:

Would you believe right now...there are 5 teams in the league with a lower shooting percentage than the Sabres?  I would have through they would be last..or at best 2nd to last.

They're DFL at even-strength...

BUF: 5.60%
NSH: 6.64%
NYI: 7.00%

...that's a 17% difference between last and second last.    Incredible.  

League average is around 9%.

PHI is humming along at 14.29%.

If BUF was league average at 9%, they would have 35 ES goals, instead they have 22.    So a difference of 13 goals at even strength.    

Consider they have 6 one goal losses (out of 10 L's).    They've played 16 games, so spread those 13 goals out and it's almost 1 extra goal per game.... could mean flipping maybe 3 of those one goal losses into W's.     Now we're looking at 9-5-2 instead of 6-8-2.   Or maybe 8-5-3...    Just incredibly unlucky.  

[jad1]

On 2/24/2021 at 9:34 AM, PASabreFan said:

So we all meet at Canalside, in the approximate location where Lorentz slayed the bat, and release a bat to freedom. Of course we have to find a bat rehab center that would be willing to let us free one of their rehabbed bats. We can't kidnap a bat and then release it under the pretense of doing something admirable.

Not kidding, folks. These places exist. And it would be a great PR stunt for them.

With our luck the bat would lift the Sabres' curse, but it would fly off and start covid 21.

[Zamboni]

On 2/24/2021 at 12:56 PM, PASabreFan said:

It should be noted that, as nfreeman points out, the Hockey Gods are political in nature. Senate-like almost. There are factions. One wing was lustily in support of breaking Jack's ankle last night. "Hobble him like that bitch in Misery!" exclaimed Pandolfo. (Hockey Gods assume the last name of retired former players.) Satan came through to broker a deal. Eichel's ankle would be only tweaked. And... he will go bald rapidly starting in 2023.

There’s not a doubt in my mind the poor guy is going to start balding early. He has the perfect crazy ginger hair for it. 

[pi2000]

somebody do something!