[Offseason] Who was the worst James Bond actor?

[Eleven]

3 minutes ago, SwampD said:

My eyes are so bad I keep reading the thread tittle as: [Olofsson] The worst James Bond actor?

Venereal diseases have serious consequences.  You probably should get this checked out.

5 minutes ago, Zamboni said:

I did exactly this yesterday. Watched part of the world is not enough… And part of Dr. No. 

Pluto is the best thing ever.  So much variety, totally free, they don't ask even for an email address.

[SwampD]

1 minute ago, Eleven said:

Venereal diseases have serious consequences.  You probably should get this checked out.

Don’t you have to have sex to get one of those? I’m probably fine.

[Taro T]

5 minutes ago, SwampD said:

My eyes are so bad I keep reading the thread tittle as: [Olofsson] The worst James Bond actor?

Even Victor would be a better James Bond than Lazenby was.

[Eleven]

1 minute ago, SwampD said:

Don’t you have to have sex to get one of those? I’m probably fine.

As ALWAYS, there is a Seinfeld about this:  

 

 

1 minute ago, Taro T said:

Even Victor would be a better James Bond than Lazenby was.

Lazenby got Emannuelle though.  And Tracy Bond.

[Taro T]

3 minutes ago, Eleven said:

As ALWAYS, there is a Seinfeld about this:  

 

 

Lazenby got Emannuelle though.  And Tracy Bond.

We've been through this.  Lazenby got Emanuelle when she was collecting the Euro equivalent of Social Security.  Not nearly as impressive as getting her in her prime.

And he got Diana Rigg killed.  What a tragic waste.

He was a disaster & Olofsson would've been leaps & bounds better.  Heck, Smehlik MIGHT have been better.

[Eleven]

1 minute ago, Taro T said:

We've been through this.  Lazenby got Emanuelle when she was collecting the Euro equivalent of Social Security.  Not nearly as impressive as getting her in her prime.

And he got Diana Rigg killed.  What a tragic waste.

He was a disaster & Olofsson would've been leaps & bounds better.  Heck, Smehlik MIGHT have been better.

It's not his fault that Timothy Dalton was worse.  

[Taro T]

Just now, Eleven said:

It's not his fault that Timothy Dalton was worse.  

Except Dalton wasn't.

[Eleven]

1 minute ago, Taro T said:

Except Dalton wasn't.

There is a highly scientific poll at the top that says otherwise.

[SwampD]

8 minutes ago, Eleven said:

There is a highly scientific poll at the top that says otherwise.

Those results, I’m sure, are mostly do to that fact Dalton was the rebound Bond for most people on this board.

[Lanny]

43 minutes ago, Eleven said:

Please fix this asap.  And start with the OLD ones.  They're on Pluto.tv for free constantly.  No registration, even.

Many of them are on Hulu now as well. 

[Zamboni]

To the women on the board (or ask your significant other) ... who is the most attractive Bond from that list?

[Eleven]

1 minute ago, Zamboni said:

To the women on the board (or ask your significant other) ... who is the most attractive Bond from that list?

EXCELLENT question!

[Drag0nDan]

On 11/15/2020 at 3:53 PM, Weave said:

Timothy Dalton and it's not even close.  He just didn't have any of the traits the character was supposed to have.

It's like Tom Cruise playing Jack Reacher.  Oh.. wait.

They're not bad movies - they're just not... bond movies? 

[Eleven]

1 hour ago, SwampD said:

Those results, I’m sure, are mostly do to that fact Dalton was the rebound Bond for most people on this board.

HIGHLY SCIENTIFIC.

[ubkev]

Best and worst:

Connery, Best: Goldfinger. Worst: Diamonds are Forever

Moore, Best: The Man With The Golden Gun. Worst: A View to A Kill

Dalton, Best: The Living Daylights. Second Best: License to Kill

Brosnan, Best: GoldenEye. Worst: The rest of them(but I still enjoy them all.)

Craig, Best: Skyfall. Worst: Quantum of Solace

Top 3 Bond songs: For Your Eyes Only, Skyfall, You Know My Name

Top 3 Bond Villains: Goldfinger, Scaramanga, Waltz's Blofeld

Best Moneypenny: Naomie Harris (honorable mention to Caroline Bliss)

Top 3 Bond Ladies: Honor Blackman(name won't get past the filter), Maud Adams x2, and Dr. Christmas Jones(hahahaha!)

Best Car: Timothy Dalton's V8 Vantage! That's right, all you Dalton haters! He even had the best car! (Second Best car was Wet Nellie, or Aki's Toyota 2000GT from You Only Live Twice)

Top 3 Gadgets: Pen grenade, phone driven car, and that watch that had a printer in it.

Best M: Judi Dench

Best Q: Desmond Llewelyn (Ben Wishaw gets a nod here though)

[Eleven]

6 minutes ago, ubkev said:

Top 3 Bond Villains: Goldfinger, Scaramanga, Waltz's Blofeld

I feel like Yaphet Kotto would like a word here.  Although it's tough to displace any of those three.  I think triple-nipple is the one I'd kick off the island for Mr. Big.

[ubkev]

9 minutes ago, Eleven said:

I feel like Yaphet Kotto would like a word here.  Although it's tough to displace any of those three.  I think triple-nipple is the one I'd kick off the island for Mr. Big.

Names is for tombstones, baby! Y'all take this honkey out and waste him!

I felt real bad leaving Solitaire off the list too. 

[Eleven]

4 minutes ago, ubkev said:

Names is for tombstones, baby! Y'all take this honkey out and waste him!

I felt real bad leaving Solitaire off the list too. 

Jane Seymour may not have been the most "Bond woman" of Bond women, but she easily is the prettiest.

[ubkev]

22 minutes ago, Eleven said:

Jane Seymour may not have been the most "Bond woman" of Bond women, but she easily is the prettiest.

Yeah, I left her off because she was more of a damsel than my other ladies. Well, not Christmas Jones. I just threw her on there because Denise Richards. 

***** Galore and Octopussy were both running things. 

[Marvin]

On 11/15/2020 at 3:16 PM, Eleven said:

Rules:  (1) David Niven doesn't count; that wasn't canon.  (2)  Please keep in mind that the writing deteriorated over time and don't blame the actors for bad scripts.  (3) You do not get to talk to Mr. Connery.

What about Barry Nelson, from the 1954 TV Movie as American Jimmy Bond working for the CIA where Felix Leiter was a Brit?  (It was broadcast on TBS many years ago when they first got rights to the Bond films.)  0:-)

[Eleven]

18 minutes ago, Marvin, Sabres Fan said:

What about Barry Nelson, from the 1954 TV Movie as American Jimmy Bond working for the CIA where Felix Leiter was a Brit?  (It was broadcast on TBS many years ago when they first got rights to the Bond films.)  0:-)

No.

[ubkev]

Best Henchmen: Oddjob, Jaws, Hinx

[Eleven]

40 minutes ago, ubkev said:

Best Henchmen: Oddjob, Jaws, Hinx

You are underrating Live and Let Die AGAIN.

[ubkev]

3 minutes ago, Eleven said:

You are underrating Live and Let Die AGAIN.

There are two ways to disable a crocodile, you know.

[Eleven]

13 minutes ago, ubkev said:

There are two ways to disable a crocodile, you know.

The ritual scene alone establishes Mr. Uncola as the greatest Bond henchman of all time.  That's before we consider Mr. Big's office, the restaurant, or the train.

 

EDIT:  Frankly, through this Sabrespace Bond journey, I'm coming to the conclusion that Live and Let Die had the best script and best theme song.  Yes, Carly Simon was and is wonderful, but Angela Lansbury's recording of Live and Let Die is freaking legendary.  And that script was as true to the novel as Casino Royale and Dr. No were, and it was a better movie despite an inferior Bond actor.

Edited November 17, 2020 by Eleven