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Posted

Funds are running a little low, and I have to pay for cruise tickets at the end of the year, so we're going to need to open up a little gas station here in the park.  You can't go back to jail for stealing gas, because it's theft under a thousand. 

So @WildCard and @3putt, I'm going to need you to go down to the mall and steal some gas.  Unleaded tastes a little tangy, supreme is kind of sour, and diesel tastes pretty good.

Yes, 3putt, this is Charlie work, which is why I'm putting you in charge of WildCard.  Hands down and don't f*ck this up.

@josie and @darksabre, I'm going to need you to run the gas purchases through coupons at your salon

@Taro T, get in your go-cart and get me half a c*ck of pepperoni and some chicken chips, ok?  Here's some money.  

@N S I need you to watch out for Lahey and that greasy cheeseburger eating Randy.

@Sue Mushedchi You're new here.  Just make sure I don't smoke while I'm on the patch and pass out.

@Alkoholist, @SwampD and @sodbuster, make sure I get permission to smoke and swear if we get arrested.

@North Buffalo Maybe make some dope rap tracks or get on with your fo-shizzle self.

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Posted

I'm on it, Ricky. Just remember to blame the smoking and swearing on the fact that you didn't get your grade 9 until you were almost 40 so it would be unfair to allow you to defend yourself without those critical elements.

When all else fails point out Lahey's drinking. He's sure to fail the breathalyzer. To make sure Randy doesn't testify against you, tell Phil Collins to park the Dirty Burger across the street from the courthouse. That fat bastard will probably jump out the window of the courthouse just to fill his gullet with those greasy treats. 

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