(OT) Scoping the Colon: The Reaming of PASabreFan

[Taro T]

You may wipe yourself raw during the prep. Maybe during the worst of it you may want to stay in a hot shower and hose yourself off occasionally. I had one last December, no pain afterwards but I was pretty loopy and slept a good chunk of the day.

2 words:

Baby wipes.

[Two or less]

 

Im not gonna click that but what kind of video could this thread possibly have... ?

[Brawndo]

 

 

No I was in the ER for multiple injuries and they wouldn't take me to surgery until I emptied my bladder, but the drugs they had me on rendered me incapable of emptying it myself. So as I laid there for what seemed like hours I finally heard my wife, the nurse practitioner, tell the ER nurse: "he'll never tell you that he can't go, just go ahead and cath him." So my own wife threw me under the bus. I had numerous follow up surgeries from that ordeal and ended up getting the roto rooter a few more times...it never got any easier.

 

As far as the colonoscopy, my grandfather died of colon cancer in his 70's and that is my only family member with a history. I've asked two different docs if I should have one, but they said I don't need it until I'm 50.

 

PA is spot on, you do not need one until you are 50.

 

Another bit of advice is to try a clear liquid diet 24 hours prior to the prep. Jello, Popsicles, soup broths. It makes the results of the prep easier.

 

Versed and propofol make the actual procedure fly by.

 

And Swamp you are correct the bill is where the real a** reaming comes into play

 

Good luck!

[I am Defecting]

I've never had one of these scans PA, so my only piece of advice, since you'll be sedated, is that you should write something clever on your butt cheeks in advance for the doctor and nurses to read.

[Claude_Verret]

I've never had one of these scans PA, so my only piece of advice, since you'll be sedated, is that you should write something clever on your butt cheeks in advance for the doctor and nurses to read.

 

Joking aside, I had a total of six eye surgeries, and as they were prepping me for each one they would have two separate nurses ask me to point to the eye needing surgery. Then they would write in big letters on my forehead above my left eye.."this eye" and I'd have to sign a document stating that it was my left eye that needed surgery. You hear the horror stories of docs operating on and/or removing the wrong body part, in my case a mistake like that could have rendered me totally blind.

[Stoner]

I've never had one of these scans PA, so my only piece of advice, since you'll be sedated, is that you should write something clever on your butt cheeks in advance for the doctor and nurses to read.

ALL HOPE ABANDON, YE WHO ENTER HERE ----> <----

 

??

[SwampD]

PA is spot on, you do not need one until you are 50.

 

Another bit of advice is to try a clear liquid diet 24 hours prior to the prep. Jello, Popsicles, soup broths. It makes the results of the prep easier.

 

Versed and propofol make the actual procedure fly by.

 

And Swamp you are correct the bill is where the real a** reaming comes into play

 

Good luck!

I know everyone says that, but (teehee) with what they found when I was thirty, I wonder if I would have even made it another twenty years.

[Stoner]

Im not gonna click that but what kind of video could this thread possibly have... ?

 

You might be surprised! It's quite delightful. But make sure nana/mama/the GF/the Mrs./daughters/nuns etc. are out of the room if you do click.

[I am Defecting]

OK PA, since nobody else is helping, I've taken the time to compile a list of things to write, before you have this procedure, on your buttocks.

 

10. No fracking!

 

9. No windmills!

 

8. Impeach Cuomo!

 

7. Make yourself welcome. My hole is your hole.

 

6. Please wait your turn.

 

5. Mastercard accepted.

 

4. Roysie was here!

 

3. Service entry only.

 

2. Hippies use back door.

 

1. Welcome to Pegulaville!

[Stoner]

You. Sick. ######.

[darksabre]

OK PA, since nobody else is helping, I've taken the time to compile a list of things to write, before you have this procedure, on your buttocks.

 

10. No fracking!

 

9. No windmills!

 

8. Impeach Cuomo!

 

7. Make yourself welcome. My hole is your hole.

 

6. Please wait your turn.

 

5. Mastercard accepted.

 

4. Roysie was here!

 

3. Service entry only.

 

2. Hippies use back door.

 

1. Welcome to Pegulaville!

 

I laughed at Impeach Cuomo. Well done. :lol:

[Stoner]

I would have worked a Hershey Bear reference in there, but that's just me.

[cdexchange]

"Roysie was here", hahaha :-)

[Stoner]

Wait... Yuri, how big do you think my ass is, or would you use 6 point Helvetica Narrow?

[shrader]

Joking aside, I had a total of six eye surgeries, and as they were prepping me for each one they would have two separate nurses ask me to point to the eye needing surgery. Then they would write in big letters on my forehead above my left eye.."this eye" and I'd have to sign a document stating that it was my left eye that needed surgery. You hear the horror stories of docs operating on and/or removing the wrong body part, in my case a mistake like that could have rendered me totally blind.

 

They do it for everything. They went crazy marking up my knee that I had scoped a few years back. I kind of wish they had just colored the whole thing with the sharpie and then accused me of being a racist for going into surgery with black knee.

 

But I guess the old joke about getting an "exit only" tattoo doesn't apply this time.

[chileanseabass]

I've always heard of a mythical guy who has a tattoo on his butt cheek of Yogi Bear, peering into "the cave" asking "Hey Boo Boo, are you in there?"

[Stoner]

I've always heard of a mythical guy who has a tattoo on his butt cheek of Yogi Bear, peering into "the cave" asking "Hey Boo Boo, are you in there?"

 

That's almost too good to be true!

 

So I'm wondering if it would make sense to eat very light tomorrow, if not start the liquid diet a day ahead of time. Or, given the apparent semi-violent nature of the cleansing, is it better to have something solid in my innards?

 

Right about now is where the faint of heart should probably stop visiting this thread. Others are free to make snacks.

[Taro T]

 

 

That's almost too good to be true!

 

So I'm wondering if it would make sense to eat very light tomorrow, if not start the liquid diet a day ahead of time. Or, given the apparent semi-violent nature of the cleansing, is it better to have something solid in my innards?

 

Right about now is where the faint of heart should probably stop visiting this thread. Others are free to make snacks.

DON'T start ahead of time.

 

You probably want to stay away from seeds/nuts - the point of this is to be empty. How much you eat won't matter; by the 3rd glass, you're pretty much clear.

[Stoner]

If I ever want to detox from heroin, I think I want Taro at my bedside.

[nfreeman]

That's almost too good to be true!

 

So I'm wondering if it would make sense to eat very light tomorrow, if not start the liquid diet a day ahead of time. Or, given the apparent semi-violent nature of the cleansing, is it better to have something solid in my innards?

 

Right about now is where the faint of heart should probably stop visiting this thread. Others are free to make snacks.

 

Chocolate cake for dessert tonight.

 

Just sayin'.

[SwampD]

And don't watch TV. It's amazing how every other commercial is for something SOOO CHEEEEEEZY, or JUUUUICEY or CRUUUNCHY or just toasted to puuuurfection. You don't even notice it when you can eat. When you can't,… it suuuhucks.

[MattPie]

I'm so glad I'm back to the board for this thread.

[cdexchange]

I think I ate a big Chipotle burrito before mine - you're gonna be really, really hungry as it is so I would definitely not start early. There's no real reason to, plus you're just asking for a longer period of "irritation" below the equator.

 

It's really unfortunate that we've never adopted the bidet concept here in the USA, I could see how that would help immensely.

 

So what time do you actually start?

Edited September 3, 2014 by cdexchange

[mphs mike]

I suspect that by now any updates from PA will be "posted from my mobile device"

[Stoner]

I think I ate a big Chipotle burrito before mine - you're gonna be really, really hungry as it is so I would definitely not start early. There's no real reason to, plus you're just asking for a longer period of "irritation" below the equator.

 

It's really unfortunate that we've never adopted the bidet concept here in the USA, I could see how that would help immensely.

 

So what time do you actually start?

 

The Pre-emptive Burrito is brilliant. If you're going to have explosive diarrhea, why not?

 

I start the prep at noon tomorrow (four Dulcolax), then hit the jug of chilled Gatorade/Miralax powder starting at 2. The "action" is predicted to start, according to the instructions, between 2 and 3 o'clock.

 

Maybe we have can a pool...