(OT) Fielding a team of Halloween Candy

[Ghost of Dwight Drane]

I was hit with an extra 30-40 kids over normal this year, so instead of enjoying some leftover goodies, I'm left only to dream of what could have been.

 

That got me to thinking....if Halloween candy was given a Sabres counterpart and you could field an entire team...how would they stack up? Sort of a riff off of X's line naming (nice job by the way).

 

 

Line 1:

 

LW - Butterfinger - This blonde bombshell is a nice mix of sweetness and crunch. It can be streaky, as you may want to eat 8 in one sitting but then not have one for 3 years. Candysabre- Thomas Vanek

 

C - KitKat - So smooth on the outside and just enough spunk on the inside to make you come back for more. A little undersized, but impossible to get sick of. Candysabre- Pat LaFontaine

 

RW - Snickers - It has all the tools, chocolate, nuts, caramel, nouget. It is rock solid and when in doubt, you can never go wrong with this as the standard. The captain of candy. Sabrecandy- Danny Gare

 

Line 2:

 

LW - Almond Joy - While others have more pure talent, the brilliant mix of attributes make this a spunky standby that can play in any situation. Candysabre- JP Dumont

 

C - Twix - Sweet caramel and crispy goodness....much like a swift playmaking center with a crisp shot. Candysabre- Dale Hawerchuk

 

RW - Payday - Nothing flashy about this guy, but he just plunks there and gets the job done. You can eat it for a snack or get away with it for a meal. Candysabre- Dave Andreychuk

 

Line 3:

 

LW - Heath - A unique candy that doesn't have the finishing power of others, but you are hardly disappointed to see it in your bag. Some may not like it's style, but holds a valuable role in the mind of most. Don't eat too much or you may get a headache. Candysabre- Jochen Hecht

 

C - Peanut M+Ms - An undersized package, but is a standard and packs a crunch. You can pick a little at a bit, or sometimes you take a whole handfull. Never the first to be eaten but never the last. Candysabre- Mike Peca

 

RW - 3 Muskateers - The same physical package of Snickers, but missing all the good stuff inside and is replaced by fluff. It may not be for you, but many candyeaters will value it in a trade. Candysabre- Taylor Pyatt

 

4th Line:

 

LW - Clark - Very similar to Butterfinger, but smaller, cheaper, not as skilled, and with more bite. A tasty combo that many forget about, but some can't get enough of. Candysabre- Vaclav Varada

 

C - Starburst - Any self-respecting person wouldn't hand this out as a go-to, but uses it as filler when the good stuff runs out. Nothing fancy about it, and is fine when bored or to give to grandma when she is over. Candysabre- Matt Ellis

 

RW - Milk Duds - A throwback. You don't see much of it or get a giant taste, but they are fun to chew on and you can be reminded hours later with a lingering taste. Most likely to send you to the dentist. Candysabre- Rob Ray

 

Defense:

 

1a - Milky Way Just smooth and sweet. Not very hearty, but as tasty as can be. Candysabre- Phil Housley

 

1b - Baby Ruth The heartiness of Snickers or Payday, but just not the skill to play offense. A solid offset to fill you up from your Milky Way. Candysabre- Jim Schoenfeld

 

2a - Nestle Crunch - A standard that is just smooth enough and just gritty enough. Not really boring but not really exciting. Candysabre- Mike Ramsey

 

2b - Twizzlers - Really a tweener. Is it a snack, do you eat 15 of them? It has a flashy flavor but sometimes lacks in substance. It's also Sweedish and falic. Candysabre- Henrik Tallinder

 

3a - Hershey Bar - A plain Crunch Bar. Candysabre- Craig Muni

 

3b - Skittles - Flashy package and sweet but tart. Some people can't stand them, but you can always pawn them off to someone before they get stale. Not much substance. Candysabre- Andrej Sekera

 

Goalie:

 

#1 - Reese's Cup - It is the ultimate candy. The smooth, sweet and salty blend of chocolate and peanut butter. It is a loner, and stands by itself, but is as delicious as it gets. You can have one every day and not get sick of it. Too much at one sitting though can make you sick. Candysabre- Dominik Hasek

 

#2 - Mallow Cup - The forgotten candy. A throwback style many forget. It is a Reese's, but with a lackluster filling. Nice to throw in for a change. Candysabre- Mika Norronen

 

Healthy scratches: Nerds, Tootsie Pop, Smarties

[darksabre]

This is ridiculous and I love it.

[thesportsbuff]

Awesome thread. You pretty much covered all the good ones so I have nothing to add, but great read!

[Weave]

Would you be willing to trade your Reese's Peanut Butter cup for a Mounds, M&M's, and future considerations?

[wjag]

Well played.. I must ask though...

 

No sweetness for Mogilny?

[That Aud Smell]

so great.

 

little disappointed not to see 100 Grand, though.

[nfreeman]

outstanding.

[ThePebble19]

so great.

 

little disappointed not to see 100 Grand, though.

 

I thought the same thing...but then I started thinking about him, and wasn't sure how he stacked up.

 

He's not the biggest candy out there, has a lot of potential, but he can't ever fully satisfy since he is always injured (or broke into two, for that matter). But beyond the constant injury issue, his biggest problem is the big contract that his skills couldn't possibly ever live up to. CandySabre: Tim Connolly

[frissonic]

I thought the same thing...but then I started thinking about him, and wasn't sure how he stacked up.

 

He's not the biggest candy out there, has a lot of potential, but he can't ever fully satisfy since he is always injured (or broke into two, for that matter). But beyond the constant injury issue, his biggest problem is the big contract that his skills couldn't possibly ever live up to. CandySabre: Tim Connolly

thanks to this, i now need monitor wipes and paper towels to clean off the coke zero. hope you're happy.

 

and thanks for the laugh. that was pure gold.

[korab rules]

Well done - but you left out Mounds

 

RW - Mounds - Kind of like his big brother Almond Joy, but doesn't do anything as well as his bro. He's weaker, smaller, not as tough, and lacks in desire and intestinal fortitude. He can play in any situation, but always leaves you wanting more. He is a nutless version of his big brother. CandySabre - Wayne Primeau

[shrader]

I had a neighbor who gave out king size snicker bars for a few years. That would be the big imposing physical defenseman who towers over everyone else, exactly what we want Myers to become.

[PromoTheRobot]

I wouldn't be surprised in Mike Schopp steals this idea for his show.

 

PTR

[X. Benedict]

 

 

RW - Milk Duds - A throwback. You don't see much of it or get a giant taste, but they are fun to chew on and you can be reminded hours later with a lingering taste. Most likely to send you to the dentist. Candysabre- Rob Ray

 

Okay...coffee in my nose from laughing.

 

Not that I have much to add but I did always think that Christian Ruttu looked like the Lemonhead guy from the lemonheads package.. :lol:

[SwampD]

They were all recently purchased by Sugar Daddy. Candysabre-Terry Pegula.

[K-9]

PayDay - Erhoff (EHRHOFF!) or Leino.

 

The descriptions are self-evident.

 

GO SABRES!!!

[R_Dudley]

:clapping: :clapping: :clapping: First rate !

[ROC Sabres]

:clapping: :clapping: :clapping: First rate !

Extra points for the healthy scratches too.

[Cereal]

I wouldn't be surprised in Mike Schopp steals this idea for his show.

 

PTR

Haha -- this was my thought, too.

[That Aud Smell]

Well done - but you left out Mounds

 

RW - Mounds - Kind of like his big brother Almond Joy, but doesn't do anything as well as his bro. He's weaker, smaller, not as tough, and lacks in desire and intestinal fortitude. He can play in any situation, but always leaves you wanting more. He is a nutless version of his big brother. CandySabre - Wayne Primeau

a very worthy contribution, especially the bolded portion.

[Ghost of Dwight Drane]

I wouldn't be surprised in Mike Schopp steals this idea for his show.

 

PTR

 

They can use it. It's sort of along the lines of a food draft.

 

I did have 100 Grand.....I like them, and Mounds too.....I'm a little upset they never made funsize Whatchamacalit. Take 5 are pretty awesome, but they never had that when I was a kid. I hate Skittles but they seem to be a favorite of some.

[TheMatrix31]

This thread is missing Sour Patch Kids!

[shrader]

They can use it. It's sort of along the lines of a food draft.

 

I did have 100 Grand.....I like them, and Mounds too.....I'm a little upset they never made funsize Whatchamacalit. Take 5 are pretty awesome, but they never had that when I was a kid. I hate Skittles but they seem to be a favorite of some.

 

You don't seem to like the fruit flavored candies at all. I'm going to have to agree on that one.

[Ghost of Dwight Drane]

This thread is missing Sour Patch Kids!

 

Boo!

 

I chuck those. They go under the Skittles family tree.

 

Double Bubble almost made it, but it's usually cheapskates who hand those out. Atomic Fireballs are nice, but same boat. Junior Mints are old school.....if someone gave a little box of Junior Mints and Milk Duds, I would respect that. Then you'd always get the 70 year old who handed out pennies, or a nickle if you were lucky. Bless their souls.

 

No good costumes this year. Someone is usually pretty clever, but I think people are going on the cheap.

[Ghost of Dwight Drane]

You don't seem to like the fruit flavored candies at all. I'm going to have to agree on that one.

 

If someone had a box of Mike+Ikes or Hot Tamales.... I like those. Usually the fruit candies represent cheapness. You hand out a Snickers or a Reeses Cup, and I know you are ok.

[Lanny]

Double Bubble almost made it, but it's usually cheapskates who hand those out.

After handing out candy to over 150 kids last year, had no choice but to make the switch this year to the "cheap skate" bag that included a high ratio of Double Bubble. Also included were smarties, warheads, etc.