Complaint Thursdays

[darksabre]

Everything my PhD coworker did today was utter crap.  :wallbash:  I just spent an hour sending emails (BCC'd to my bosses) correcting all of his lazy mistakes. This guy has been here almost a year and has not improved one bit. Kill me. 

[qwksndmonster]

Thanks, everyone. Y'all are the best.

 

I'm very ready to get away for a while.

[Eleven]

Thanks, everyone. Y'all are the best.

 

I'm very ready to get away for a while.

 

 

I want you to understand this.  Everyone dies.  It sucks, but the minute you're born, that clock starts ticking.  The only thing you don't know is when the bell will ring.  You know my story; no need to repeat.

 

Your grandmother loves you, as is said upthread.  Generally, the older generations look at the younger ones and just want them to enjoy life.  I look at my niece and nephew (one generation, not two like your gramma) and all I want is to watch them laugh and learn things.

 

Your grandmother got to see that with you for over 20 years.  She loved every freaking minute of it, don't doubt that for a second.  And she wants you to have fun on your trip.  I hope she's around when you get back.  If for some reason she isn't, well, it's only because she's enjoying watching you from upstairs.

 

Have a great trip, man.  And blessings to your gram.

[nfreeman]

I want you to understand this.  Everyone dies.  It sucks, but the minute you're born, that clock starts ticking.  The only thing you don't know is when the bell will ring.  You know my story; no need to repeat.

 

Your grandmother loves you, as is said upthread.  Generally, the older generations look at the younger ones and just want them to enjoy life.  I look at my niece and nephew (one generation, not two like your gramma) and all I want is to watch them laugh and learn things.

 

Your grandmother got to see that with you for over 20 years.  She loved every freaking minute of it, don't doubt that for a second.  And she wants you to have fun on your trip.  I hope she's around when you get back.  If for some reason she isn't, well, it's only because she's enjoying watching you from upstairs.

 

Have a great trip, man.  And blessings to your gram.

 

Beautiful.

 

Qwk -- God bless you and your gramma.

[WildCard]

That was well said Eleven. I'd like to echo what others said better than I could qwk, I hope you're alright

 

Last complaint of the night I guess. In a little mini funk, it sucks. Small in the grand scheme of things though

[Buffalo Wings]

When you're the only network guy in IT and 6 people want your time...three of which who assume you'll drop everything and work on their problem.

[GoPre]

 

:sick:  already have mixed feelings about this one.

 

 

What about this one? I actually enjoyed the movie. But a tv series based on a movie does not always do well....

 

So quit making them!

Edited June 9, 2016 by GoPre

[josie]

Context- my best friend at work is leaving for a better job. Apparently she got drunk with the bosses last week and told them people were disgruntled in the company. Another person there told me she did not say names.

 

I received a drunken text from my boss that night, asking me to meet with them the next day. My boss one by one pulled aside the people she's friends with, myself included. And it was the most unprofessional, terrible, witch hunting interrogation. He sat me down and tried to spin it as a catching up meeting, but then just kept asking "What's wrong". I was taken aback. So, I listed three major things that are affecting the designers at this company, things that no company worth its salt should allow to happen (all professional things, nothing social or about the toxic culture). He became increasingly defensive, and shot down every idea or comment.

 

Not a "thanks for you feedback, we'll take that into consideration" but a "well, you're wrong. So what else is wrong". I asked if there was a problem, and he responded "no, no you're doing great, just, what's wrong". "I haven't really posted any complaints". "Well... so what's wrong." It made me feel so terrible, you ask for feedback, I give it to you, and you tell me it's stupid. You make me feel like a student caught vandalizing something. He said he feels I'm kind of the "pulse" of everyone there. Well... it would be horribly unprofessional of me to tell you the real problems, and you'd dismiss me as whiny if I did.  

 

He was clearly panicking. I found out later that the third in command is looking at leaving too. So that makes... 16 people if they actually go. 

Ten minutes after this, they had a shot making competition and all was sunny and light. 

 

Throw in my project manager cracking constant ma$turbation and porn jokes, being a sexist douche, and being one of the worst PMs I've ever worked with, and the clients being terrible and... well, at least they're not making me feel bad about leaving. 

I am honestly terrified to have the talk with them. I am afraid they will sabotage me some way. 

Edited June 9, 2016 by Josie914

[Buffalo Wings]

Context- my best friend at work is leaving for a better job. Apparently she got drunk with the bosses last week and told them people were disgruntled in the company. Another person there told me she did not say names.

 

I received a drunken text from my boss that night, asking me to meet with them the next day. My boss one by one pulled aside the people she's friends with, myself included. And it was the most unprofessional, terrible, witch hunting interrogation. He sat me down and tried to spin it as a catching up meeting, but then just kept asking "What's wrong". I was taken aback. So, I listed three major things that are affecting the designers at this company, things that no company worth its salt should allow to happen (all professional things, nothing social or about the toxic culture). He became increasingly defensive, and shot down every idea or comment.

 

Not a "thanks for you feedback, we'll take that into consideration" but a "well, you're wrong. So what else is wrong". I asked if there was a problem, and he responded "no, no you're doing great, just, what's wrong". "I haven't really posted any complaints". "Well... so what's wrong." It made me feel so terrible, you ask for feedback, I give it to you, and you tell me it's stupid. You make me feel like a student caught vandalizing something. He said he feels I'm kind of the "pulse" of everyone there. Well... it would be horribly unprofessional of me to tell you the real problems, and you'd dismiss me as whiny if I did.  

 

He was clearly panicking. I found out later that the third in command is looking at leaving too. So that makes... 16 people if they actually go. 

Ten minutes after this, they had a shot making competition and all was sunny and light. 

 

Throw in my project manager cracking constant ma$turbation and porn jokes, being a sexist douche, and being one of the worst PMs I've ever worked with, and the clients being terrible and... well, at least they're not making me feel bad about leaving. 

 

I am honestly terrified to have the talk with them. I am afraid they will sabotage me some way. 

 

Sounds like a multitude of things went wrong with that whole scenario. Perhaps your friend was trying to help the disgruntled employees, but providing feedback at the bar probably wasn't the best forum to do so.

 

I just ran into the same scenario a little over a year ago - our executive held 1-on-1 meetings with the 5 of us who are the most senior within the department. When asked what was wrong, we were all honest and indicated one particular boss was too nitpicky, was micromanaging everyone in the department, and generally holding us back. We were told the exact same thing "You're wrong, so have some thick skin and buck up."

 

:blink:

[darksabre]

Context- my best friend at work is leaving for a better job. Apparently she got drunk with the bosses last week and told them people were disgruntled in the company. Another person there told me she did not say names.

 

I received a drunken text from my boss that night, asking me to meet with them the next day. My boss one by one pulled aside the people she's friends with, myself included. And it was the most unprofessional, terrible, witch hunting interrogation. He sat me down and tried to spin it as a catching up meeting, but then just kept asking "What's wrong". I was taken aback. So, I listed three major things that are affecting the designers at this company, things that no company worth its salt should allow to happen (all professional things, nothing social or about the toxic culture). He became increasingly defensive, and shot down every idea or comment.

 

Not a "thanks for you feedback, we'll take that into consideration" but a "well, you're wrong. So what else is wrong". I asked if there was a problem, and he responded "no, no you're doing great, just, what's wrong". "I haven't really posted any complaints". "Well... so what's wrong." It made me feel so terrible, you ask for feedback, I give it to you, and you tell me it's stupid. You make me feel like a student caught vandalizing something. He said he feels I'm kind of the "pulse" of everyone there. Well... it would be horribly unprofessional of me to tell you the real problems, and you'd dismiss me as whiny if I did.  

 

He was clearly panicking. I found out later that the third in command is looking at leaving too. So that makes... 16 people if they actually go. 

Ten minutes after this, they had a shot making competition and all was sunny and light. 

 

Throw in my project manager cracking constant ma$turbation and porn jokes, being a sexist douche, and being one of the worst PMs I've ever worked with, and the clients being terrible and... well, at least they're not making me feel bad about leaving. 

 

I am honestly terrified to have the talk with them. I am afraid they will sabotage me some way. 

They can't sabotage you. Don't worry about that. When the time comes, you give them your two weeks notice in writing and that is that. You can oblige them with an exit interview on your last day if you choose, but other than working on getting things squared away with paperwork there shouldn't be much to discuss. 

[inkman]

Context- my best friend at work is leaving for a better job. Apparently she got drunk with the bosses last week and told them people were disgruntled in the company. Another person there told me she did not say names.

 

I received a drunken text from my boss that night, asking me to meet with them the next day. My boss one by one pulled aside the people she's friends with, myself included. And it was the most unprofessional, terrible, witch hunting interrogation. He sat me down and tried to spin it as a catching up meeting, but then just kept asking "What's wrong". I was taken aback. So, I listed three major things that are affecting the designers at this company, things that no company worth its salt should allow to happen (all professional things, nothing social or about the toxic culture). He became increasingly defensive, and shot down every idea or comment.

 

Not a "thanks for you feedback, we'll take that into consideration" but a "well, you're wrong. So what else is wrong". I asked if there was a problem, and he responded "no, no you're doing great, just, what's wrong". "I haven't really posted any complaints". "Well... so what's wrong." It made me feel so terrible, you ask for feedback, I give it to you, and you tell me it's stupid. You make me feel like a student caught vandalizing something. He said he feels I'm kind of the "pulse" of everyone there. Well... it would be horribly unprofessional of me to tell you the real problems, and you'd dismiss me as whiny if I did.

 

He was clearly panicking. I found out later that the third in command is looking at leaving too. So that makes... 16 people if they actually go.

Ten minutes after this, they had a shot making competition and all was sunny and light.

 

Throw in my project manager cracking constant ma$turbation and porn jokes, being a sexist douche, and being one of the worst PMs I've ever worked with, and the clients being terrible and... well, at least they're not making me feel bad about leaving.

 

I am honestly terrified to have the talk with them. I am afraid they will sabotage me some way.

Sounds like your boss was fit to be in charge in the 80s or maybe the 50s. These vindictive emotional types are being weeded out at my employer.

Sounds like a multitude of things went wrong with that whole scenario. Perhaps your friend was trying to help the disgruntled employees, but providing feedback at the bar probably wasn't the best forum to do so.

 

I just ran into the same scenario a little over a year ago - our executive held 1-on-1 meetings with the 5 of us who are the most senior within the department. When asked what was wrong, we were all honest and indicated one particular boss was too nitpicky, was micromanaging everyone in the department, and generally holding us back. We were told the exact same thing "You're wrong, so have some thick skin and buck up."

 

:blink:

I unfortunately had to have a similar conversation with my employees. They were butting heads with one manager at night. I talked to HR and his boss and they agreed he was in the wrong. Eventually he left and things worked out. In the meantime I told my employees to hold on and endure.

[josie]

Sounds like a multitude of things went wrong with that whole scenario. Perhaps your friend was trying to help the disgruntled employees, but providing feedback at the bar probably wasn't the best forum to do so.

 

I just ran into the same scenario a little over a year ago - our executive held 1-on-1 meetings with the 5 of us who are the most senior within the department. When asked what was wrong, we were all honest and indicated one particular boss was too nitpicky, was micromanaging everyone in the department, and generally holding us back. We were told the exact same thing "You're wrong, so have some thick skin and buck up."

 

:blink:

My god, that sounds so familiar. 

 

I brought up that we need another art director (we used to have 3 for about 12 people... now we have 1 for about 30), a few feedback issues, and that some kind of hierarchy would be good. As it stands, besides the AD, everyone is "equal". But they are not, because if you're a barstormers drinky pal, you're a lead. People in-fight over projects, and it becomes detrimental to work and timelines, as well as creating a tense atmosphere. 

 

I am the third most senior designer, I have been here 5 years, from the 13th employee (lucky lucky) to 48 people at its peak. I couched my arguments in good sense and gave alternative wiggle room solutions. Was told I would ruin the culture. Well.. dear... that's why half your company wants to leave, is the culture. 

 

It's sad, this boss is a good dude, he's just overwhelmed. The real boss doesn't care, we're his private piggy bank/ego trip. 

 

And I'm very upset with my friend for bringing this crap up over drinks. Don't. Drink. With. Your. Bosses. A little is fine. Like, 3x a year, Xmas, a party, and like, one other shindig. But becoming drinking buddies? Good job, you are now Part of the Problem. You can't use good judgement then. 

[inkman]

My god, that sounds so familiar.

 

I brought up that we need another art director (we used to have 3 for about 12 people... now we have 1 for about 30), a few feedback issues, and that some kind of hierarchy would be good. As it stands, besides the AD, everyone is "equal". But they are not, because if you're a barstormers drinky pal, you're a lead. People in-fight over projects, and it becomes detrimental to work and timelines, as well as creating a tense atmosphere.

 

I am the third most senior designer, I have been here 5 years, from the 13th employee (lucky lucky) to 48 people at its peak. I couched my arguments in good sense and gave alternative wiggle room solutions. Was told I would ruin the culture. Well.. dear... that's why half your company wants to leave, is the culture.

 

It's sad, this boss is a good dude, he's just overwhelmed. The real boss doesn't care, we're his private piggy bank/ego trip.

 

And I'm very upset with my friend for bringing this crap up over drinks. Don't. Drink. With. Your. Bosses. A little is fine. Like, 3x a year, Xmas, a party, and like, one other shindig. But becoming drinking buddies? Good job, you are now Part of the Problem. You can't use good judgement then.

I always keep an arms distance between my employees and my bosses. My direct supervisor friended me on 3 different types of social networks and I begrudgingly had to accept as to not raise any suspicion. Now I am super careful about what I post because of it.

[Buffalo Wings]

And I'm very upset with my friend for bringing this crap up over drinks. Don't. Drink. With. Your. Bosses. A little is fine. Like, 3x a year, Xmas, a party, and like, one other shindig. But becoming drinking buddies? Good job, you are now Part of the Problem. You can't use good judgement then. 

 

Exactly...when you go out drinking with them, you essentially become one of them. Had that happen at a job years ago and that person eventually became a manager and we saw that person turn from a good, smart employee to toeing the company line every time he spoke.

[jsb]

A word to the wise...... Do not socialize with your employers..... Do not socialize with your employees, neither is a good mix. Do so in work functions only. Keep work relations at work. I have also found that in most situations, making friends with co-workers is not a good idea either. Being friendly and being friends are 2 entirely different things. Typically they don't mix and match.

[biodork]

So many complaints.

 

This thread was never unlocked last week, so this is a carryover that I'll now abbreviate since I don't have the energy to type it all out.  Basically got backed into a corner last Thurs. to where the potential transfer in jobs (still with my boss, but away from the psycho manager) went from optional to mandatory.  I don't want that job any more than I want this one, but at least it'll get me away from the crazy biotch so I accepted last Friday.  My boss had said we could make the change fairly immediate and asked me to consider how much time I would need to finish up here.  When I accepted via email I told her I'd need at least a week to wrap things up but would defer to the manager if she'd like me to stay a bit longer to help with some other things, and asked her to discuss those preferences.

 

Fast forward to early this week, and have yet to hear back from my boss confirming my decision and a timeline for the transfer.  She said something in a group meeting Tues. that suggests she's aware and expecting the move, but the manager here has said things that suggest she has no idea.  Now it's Thursday, I'm off tomorrow, and I have no idea what I'm supposed to do next week.  I guess I'll be back in the same place next week and potentially transfer the one after, but as much as I'm looking forward to getting away from her, I don't feel it's right for me to leave without giving her a chance to say what exactly she needs/wants me to finish before I go.  What a clusterf*ck.

 

In separate news, I've been looking into buying a condo or townhouse out here because rents are insane, and I saw a place on Tues. evening that I absolutely loved.  It only hit the MLS that afternoon and I didn't want to get into a bidding war, so my realtor put in an offer that night for slightly above list price with a deadline to accept by late afternoon Wed.  The seller's agent has yet to return any of my agent's messages or even confirm receipt of the offer, so he suspects she's just collecting offers to drive up the price.  (The market is insane out here and the good places regularly go under contract in 2-4 days.)  I'm pissed that she's being so inconsiderate of anyone else's time.

Edited June 9, 2016 by biodork

[darksabre]

A word to the wise...... Do not socialize with your employers..... Do not socialize with your employees, neither is a good mix. Do so in work functions only. Keep work relations at work. I have also found that in most situations, making friends with co-workers is not a good idea either. Being friendly and being friends are 2 entirely different things. Typically they don't mix and match.

 

This has always been my approach as well. I don't mind having friends at work if I knew them prior to the job, but I don't tend to get too buddy buddy with my co-workers. 

 

Jo's current situation is that the company was founded by friends, and friends hired friends, and friends recommended friends, and everyone wants to be friends, not co-workers. Which is a huge barrier to having any kind of professionalism. It's basically not real life there. 

[josie]

A word to the wise...... Do not socialize with your employers..... Do not socialize with your employees, neither is a good mix. Do so in work functions only. Keep work relations at work. I have also found that in most situations, making friends with co-workers is not a good idea either. Being friendly and being friends are 2 entirely different things. Typically they don't mix and match.

This is generally my philosophy. However, at my current workplace, half the company lived together at some point (they seriously named the house they lived in after teh company), have been best buddies since freshman year in college, and break up with their significant others in order to "spend more time together". They drink 4x a week together, go to music festivals on the company's dime and do drugs, and generally think NOT being in their weird incestuous cuddle puddle means there's something wrong with you. 

 

My god, I just want to work somewhere where I can be friendly with everyone, but not feel like I'm in a weird dorm situation. I crave professionalism. I crave respect. I want my boss to be my boss, not a potential Best Friend and Drinking Pal! 

[biodork]

This is generally my philosophy. However, at my current workplace, half the company lived together at some point (they seriously named the house they lived in after teh company), have been best buddies since freshman year in college, and break up with their significant others in order to "spend more time together". They drink 4x a week together, go to music festivals on the company's dime and do drugs, and generally think NOT being in their weird incestuous cuddle puddle means there's something wrong with you. 

 

My god, I just want to work somewhere where I can be friendly with everyone, but not feel like I'm in a weird dorm situation. I crave professionalism. I crave respect. I want my boss to be my boss, not a potential Best Friend and Drinking Pal! 

 

I am going to make it my mission to use this phrase in the future.  Well done.

[Taro T]

This is generally my philosophy. However, at my current workplace, half the company lived together at some point (they seriously named the house they lived in after teh company), have been best buddies since freshman year in college, and break up with their significant others in order to "spend more time together". They drink 4x a week together, go to music festivals on the company's dime and do drugs, and generally think NOT being in their weird incestuous cuddle puddle means there's something wrong with you. 

 

My god, I just want to work somewhere where I can be friendly with everyone, but not feel like I'm in a weird dorm situation. I crave professionalism. I crave respect. I want my boss to be my boss, not a potential Best Friend and Drinking Pal!

 

Really? Thought you were an artist. ;)

 

Sorry. Couldn't resist. On the bright side, it sounds like you've already made your decision to leave. Would be shocked if this meeting causes them to push you out before you leave anyway. Use it as it is: 1 more chit in the "reasons to leave" column & 1 more "reason not to feel guilty about it" when that day in the near future arrives. :beer:

[GoPre]

I always keep an arms distance between my employees and my bosses. My direct supervisor friended me on 3 different types of social networks and I begrudgingly had to accept as to not raise any suspicion. Now I am super careful about what I post because of it.

 

I teach and coach for a living. When a parent of child I coach wants to be friends on Facebook, I never accept. I mistakenly accepted a friend quest from a parent, and to this day I am very careful w/ what I post. It's gotten to the point where I only post if I have to. We have a team page to keep everyone up to date on practices times, fundraisers, etc.... That's about it for me on Facebook. Well, of course I keep in touch w/ family and close friends on the social network, but again I pay close attention to what I say. 

 

Teachers are often advised to not have a social network account. You can lose your job if something questionable gets out. 

 

And here I am on sabrespace....  :unsure:

Edited June 9, 2016 by GoPre

[darksabre]

Really? Thought you were an artist. ;)

 

Sorry. Couldn't resist. On the bright side, it sounds like you've already made your decision to leave. Would be shocked if this meeting causes them to push you out before you leave anyway. Use it as it is: 1 more chit in the "reasons to leave" column & 1 more "reason not to feel guilty about it" when that day in the near future arrives. :beer:

 

Asking Josie not to feel guilty is a losing battle. Someone could stab her with a knife and she'd feel guilty about getting blood on them.  :P

[josie]

Asking Josie not to feel guilty is a losing battle. Someone could stab her with a knife and she'd feel guilty about getting blood on them.  :P

Well, dude, obviously I did something wrong to motivate the stabbing! I deserved it! 

 

My brain is a labyrinth of stupid. 

 

Really? Thought you were an artist. ;)

 

Sorry. Couldn't resist. On the bright side, it sounds like you've already made your decision to leave. Would be shocked if this meeting causes them to push you out before you leave anyway. Use it as it is: 1 more chit in the "reasons to leave" column & 1 more "reason not to feel guilty about it" when that day in the near future arrives. :beer:

Awww c'mon now. I'm an illustrator or a designer, thank you very much!  :lol:

 

But yes, you are absolutely right. The hard part now is holding it together and not getting too depressed at the application process. I've never felt so stressed out- this is probably the largest decision I've made on my own in my life. 

 

Heh, update: 9 of my coworkers just left to go party until Tuesday together for one of their birthdays. The office is nice and quiet now... and I'm stuck with this bucket load of "emergency" work.... which I just now realized is their work.... 

Edited June 9, 2016 by Josie914

[MattPie]

When you're the only network guy in IT and 6 people want your time...three of which who assume you'll drop everything and work on their problem.

 

repeat after me: "Your emergency is not necessarily my priority."

[LGR4GM]

I am going to make it my mission to use this phrase in the future.  Well done.

I concur. "weird incestuous cuddle puddle" is kind of brilliant.